Goodbye and Good Luck

TOPIC: Rites of Passage

SOURCE:  The transition from living at home for the first 18 years of my live to now living on my own for the past two years. 

RELATION: “In a classic work, Arnold van Gennep introduced the concept of rites of passage.  These rituals mark a person’s passage from one identity to another (Anthro 139).”

DESCRIPTION:  Growing up we all knew the day would come when it was time for us to move out of the house.  When we were really young this idea seemed scary, then in our teenage years we could wait for nothing else.  But when that fateful day comes, your entire childhood living at home flashes before your eyes.  You think of your mom cooking you breakfast on Sunday’s and your dad helping you fix your car.  You think of all the things that your parents have been doing for you that you now have to do on your own.  You are an adult now, and you have to take responsibility for your own life.  Oh, crap.

COMMENTARY/ANALYSIS:  I believe that moving out is one of the most common rites of passage in American society.  Once you graduate high school, you then move on to college or a job and ultimately, out of your parents’ house.  Living on your own marks the beginning of adulthood for many people, it is the time in your live where you finally have to just stand up and do things for yourself.  Once you live on your own, no one is there to do the grocery shopping for you, no one is there to do your laundry, your dishes, cook, clean, pay the bills…  It’s all on your back now, and from my own experience, I know that it can come as a bit of a shock.  But living on your own is when you really discover who you are, what you like, and how you want your life to be.  This is the time when you can make all of your decisions for yourself, without always having to consult your parents or someone else beforehand.  It is a time of personal discovery and growth.  It is a time to put everything our parents taught us to use to make our own lives a little easier.  This is the transition from childhood to adulthood; you’re on your own now.   

The More the Merrier

TOPIC: Ideal Family Forms

SOURCE:  Living in a household with extended family. 

RELATION: “Families in other societies may be composed very differently (Anthro 111).” 

DESCRIPTION: I went through two different experiences in my life where my family lived with my father’s parents, my Oma and Opa (that’s Dutch for grandma and grandpa).  The first was the summer between second and third grade.  My family demolished our house and during the process of rebuilding it we moved in with Oma and Opa at their house in Mission Beach.  All I can remember from that time was good memories.  I was so happy to have my grandparents around all the time, plus, it was right near the beach.  My sister and I would be out all day playing on the boardwalk with our neighbors; my little brother sometimes would tag along too.  At night I would help my Oma cook dinner and my Opa would wrestle with us until we cried.  I have to say that the summer I spent living with them was one of the best in my memory.

The second experience was after our house was complete and, sadly, my grandparents decided to sell the house on the beach.  Then they moved in with us.  This time around I was at the beginning of my teenage years and, at first, I was not quite sure how I felt about it.  It was during the time when I treasured nothing more than my privacy and more people in the house did not help with that.  I can’t even say how many years they lived with us but it was for quite a few years, until they bought a house boat on San Diego Bay about 3 years ago.  I remember in the mornings my Oma would make delicious Dutch pancakes and my Opa would sit and read the paper, drinking coffee.  Every Thursday we would watch Survivor and eat Beef Stew and bon bons for dessert.   

COMMENTARY/ANALYSIS:  Going from living with just my nuclear family to having extended family move in with you was an interesting experience that I overall enjoyed.  I liked being able to see my grandparents more often than I did before.  It was a great way to get to know them better and it gave them more of a chance to share their stories and knowledge with us.  I believe that families who live with their relatives tend to have a stronger bond.  You not only have your mother and father for advice or help, but your grandfather and grandmother, or aunt and uncle are there too.  Although it can become overwhelming having so many people in a house, I think that it has rich benefits with keeping families close.  Unfortunately, now I get to see my family even less than I ever have before, but that is was makes me appreciate it more.